Charming Colton Read online

  My hands are shaking as I put the phone back in my pocket. I can’t possibly respond to him right now.

  The meeting ends ten minutes later, and I wait until I’m back in my office alone before I consider my response.

  I’m fine. I wasn’t flustered. And you didn’t push me too far. Don’t you have bad guys to catch? Why are you texting me?

  I grin as I send it.

  Seconds later, I’m watching the three little dots that indicate he’s responding already.

  Amazing how you can manage to both lie and sass me in so few words. What shall I do about that? Get back to work. I’ll see you at six.

  I gasp as I set the phone on my desk. Holy shit. My legs are bouncing under the desk. It feels too warm in here. And for the first time in my career, I’m aroused at work. I might have lied about being flustered when I got out of the car, but I’m ten times more flustered now.

  Lacy pokes her head into my office, making me jump in my seat. She frowns. “You okay?”

  “Yep. Yes. Sorry. You startled me. What’s up?”

  “I just wanted to see if you’d like to grab lunch? I’m in the mood for a salad.”

  I ponder how to respond. “Sounds great. Can we order it to be delivered? I’m not sure I have the time to go out today. But I could take thirty when it gets here. Will that work?”

  “Perfect. I’ll place our order. The usual?”

  “Yes, and add a large iced tea.”

  “Got it. See you when it arrives.” Lacy wanders away.

  I stare at the door. Iced tea? Do I think that’s going to shake me out of my hazy gray zone like the coffee? Good grief.

  Chapter 13

  Colton

  * * *

  I slide into the booth at the greasy burger joint I love moments before Davis arrives to join me.

  “How’s it going?” he asks as he sits across from me. “I keep thinking you’ll need some backup help from Black Blade, but I haven’t heard a peep out of you.”

  I smirk. “You think I can’t handle my job on my own?” I joke.

  He chuckles. “I have no doubt you can.”

  A waiter comes by to take our orders. Davis meets my gaze again. “Seriously though. Have you made any headway?”

  I sigh. “Not much. I’m paying close attention to Owen Karplus and the mysterious stalker. That asshole was waiting in front of Eve’s building again today, but he hasn’t cottoned on to the fact that she’s been leaving in my car yet. I wonder how he thinks she gets to work or if he believes himself to be slipping.”

  “Shit, though. I can’t stand the idea of someone watching her. Does she know it?”

  “I don’t always tell her. Had to yesterday while she was at lunch outside of her office building, but I don’t mention it in the mornings or when we come home.”

  “And Owen? What’s he been up to?”

  “Nothing. Seems clean so far. Goes to work. Goes home mostly. I’ve dug deeper into his finances though. His bar is upside down. He’s hurting for cash flow.”

  “That could mean something. Or it could mean nothing.” Davis sighs. “Plenty of people lose their businesses every day without deciding to sell a human being to save themselves.”

  “Exactly.” I sit back. “Hopefully I’ll get a better read on Owen tomorrow night at the club. Otherwise, I’m spinning my tires right now. I finally got a picture of the stalker, but he’s not in the system.”

  “Damn. That sucks.”

  “My boss sent it for deeper analysis, but that’s going to take some time. He hasn’t done anything. He’s no real threat to anyone as far as the law is concerned. Maybe he just finds Eve attractive and he’s building up the courage to ask her out.”

  Davis smirks. “You don’t believe that.”

  “Fuck no. Neither does anyone else. But that’s where the rule of law stands right now.”

  Davis sighs. “Send me the picture and I’ll ask Roman and Julius if they recognize the man on the off chance he’s a member of Surrender or has ever visited. I’ll give a copy to Blade too. You never know what he might come up with.”

  I nod. “Good idea.” I have no doubt Davis’s boss has a database that would rival anything at the police station. Black Blade Protection is the equivalent of a privatized police agency.

  The waiter drops off our drinks, and then Davis meets my gaze when we’re alone again. “That’s not why you asked me to lunch.”

  I shake my head. “No.”

  He smiles. “How did it go with Eve after you left the other night? It was intense. I hope you don’t feel like I tossed you to the wolves.”

  “Not at all. I needed the education. I’ll be far more prepared tomorrow night. I appreciate it. And please, thank Britney for me. I know that wasn’t easy on her either.”

  “She’s fine. I rewarded her well after you left.” His grin is big.

  I roll my eyes. “Please, spare me the details.”

  He sobers and sets his elbows on the table. “How’s Eve?”

  I draw in a slow breath. “Confused. And I’m not helping out any.” I play with the napkin in front of me, picking off small chunks absently as I stare at it.

  “You’re into her.”

  I roll my shoulders back and groan. “Yes. And I can’t be. It’s so unprofessional. Plus, there are a dozen or more other reasons I need to keep my pants on.”

  He chuckles. “Life gets messy sometimes when we least expect it. Maybe you should just follow your instincts.”

  “I have and they’re leading us both into dangerous territory.” I groan again. “I’ve gone all Dom on her. I didn’t even know I had such a dominant side. It just comes out of me from somewhere. Or she brings it out of me. Mostly because she’s been lost without it. She needs it. It calms her. So does my touch.”

  “I noticed that the other night. Has she let you see her little?”

  I nod. “She was very hesitant at first. I don’t blame her. I’m sure she feels vulnerable. But it was stressing her out. She’s used to coming home and relaxing in her little space. With me there, she’s been stifled. So, last night, I insisted she let it go. I think we had a breakthrough.”

  “That’s good. So, what’s the problem?” He’s smirking again.

  Our food arrives and we begin to assemble and doctor our burgers as we continue speaking. “Besides the fact that I cannot mess with this woman?”

  “Why not? You’re entitled to a life, Colton. No one can be expected to devote their entire lives to their job and never settle down.”

  “It’s the nature of my job, and you know it.”

  He waves a hand through the air. “Let’s cross that bridge later. Stop worrying about the future and deal with the present. Are you surprised to find you have dominant tendencies?”

  I shrug. “I don’t know. Never really thought about it. I guess I would have described myself as a fairly alpha sort of guy, but the shift in my mindset to someone bossy and demanding is unexpected.”

  “But it’s what Eve needs.”

  I nod. “Yes. So it just sort of comes out of me.”

  “That’s not a bad thing.”

  I set my burger down and meet him eye-to-eye. “I dominated her hard this morning. She needed it. It was hotter than hell. But I also know I overstepped in doing so. On top of that, I piled onto that domination by text two hours later. She’s either throwing stuff at the wall in her office or squirming in her seat. I’m not sure which is worse.”

  Davis chuckles. “Could be both. And good for you. Eve is incredibly submissive. She needs a strong Dom in her life. Someone who can help her see things through a new lens.”

  “The woman maintains two personas like they’re a lifeline. She doesn’t let them cross, nor does she let the lines blur. I’m messing with her tidy plan.”

  “Britney knows her better than I do, but from what I’ve heard, you’re right. She’s been kind of rigid and it keeps her from letting anyone get close.”

  “It took her a long time to explain h
er preferences after we left your house. I could see that Britney gets off on the submission and every aspect of her life. Eve made it clear that she does not.”

  Davis nods and finishes his bite before responding. “That’s not unusual. Lots of littles keep sex out of it. They want to escape and find it refreshing to color or play with toys to block out the real world for a while. Nothing wrong with that, nor is it peculiar for them to enjoy getting disciplined without getting aroused. They prefer to keep the two sides separate.”

  “That’s exactly how Eve described things to me, and I get it. It makes sense. But either she’s been lying to herself and others or it’s different with me.”

  Davis cocks his head to one side. “How so?”

  I meet his gaze. “This doesn’t leave this table, right?”

  “Never. Hard rule in the BDSM community. I would never break a confidence. You have my word.”

  “Eve likes me. Both of her personas like me. I know it. It’s as clear as the sun in the sky.” I glance at the window. This is Seattle. The sky is not clear most days, including today. “At the equator.”

  Davis laughs. “Okay, so that’s great. She likes you. What’s the problem? And don’t tell me again about your job.” He waves his hand dismissively again. “Pretend that issue doesn’t exist for now. What other roadblocks are there?”

  “Eve. She has it set in her mind that she doesn’t sleep with Daddies and she doesn’t tell her vanilla boyfriends about her little side.”

  “I figured. So, she never gets close to anyone.”

  “Right.”

  “And now you’re in her space and it’s confusing.”

  “Exactly. There’s no way for her to compartmentalize like she’s used to. The lines are blurring. I can see it. She shares both sides of herself with me, and that’s not something she does normally.” I hesitate but then tell him more because damn, I need his advice. Who the hell else am I going to ask? “She sleeps with me. And by that I mean, I sleep in her bed. I have from the first night when she woke up scared. She’s little in her bed, and she subconsciously gravitates to my side and curls up against me. It’s fucking adorable.”

  Davis grins. “How cute.”

  I groan yet again. “That’s not helpful.”

  “Look, just because she can sleep next to you doesn’t mean she would be willing to have sex in her little space. Even if she responds sexually while she’s little doesn’t mean she wouldn’t prefer to get out of that headspace and be an adult while having sex. It’s possible, but not mandatory. Everyone is different.”

  I nod. “That makes sense.”

  “That being said, I have no idea what Eve is thinking. Britney is never out of her little space with me. We marginally set her little aside when we have sex, but it’s subtle at best. Not everyone is the same, and it’s possible Eve is staring at new possibilities. The woman deserves to find a man who can be everything to her. Let her be little when she needs it but also step aside while she achieves world domination.”

  I laugh. “I have no doubt she’s capable of that. She’s a force of nature at work.”

  “I believe you. I’ve seen her come into the club from work. She’s a different person when she heads into the locker room to change. The girl who comes out hardly resembles the woman who goes in.”

  I can totally picture what he’s describing. “I feel bad that I toyed with her today. She has made it clear that her adult persona doesn’t submit, and I blurred that line. She’s probably pissed.”

  “I doubt it, but if she is, she’ll tell you, and you’ll deal.”

  “I’m scared out of my mind about tomorrow night. I don’t care what she’s told me about how she doesn’t find her scenes sexual. I do. I find all of her sides sexual. It’s going to be very hard to stay out of her way and watch her submit to another man.”

  Davis nods. “I understand, but you have to do it. At least this once. You can talk to her about how it made you feel afterward, but let her do her thing tomorrow. If she feels as much for you as you do for her, she won’t enjoy submitting to another man, especially if the lines between you two have blurred as much as you think.”

  I play with a fry, dragging it through the catsup even though I have no intention of eating it. “I’m in way over my head.”

  Davis leans forward. “You’re not. Take it one day at a time. One hour if you need to. Take your cues from Eve. All you can do is say and act on whatever feels natural to you and watch how she reacts. I know she has a prearranged scene with Owen tomorrow night, but keep in mind, she has told you that things with him are strictly platonic. Don’t doubt her or accuse her otherwise. Let her work this out in her own way. I’m confident you won’t be sorry.”

  I lean back and stare at Davis before saying one more thing. “I kissed her.”

  Davis gives me a slow smile. “I figured.”

  “I don’t even know if I kissed her little or her adult. She doesn’t know either.”

  “That’s okay. She’ll figure it out. You’ll figure it out together. It’s not like there are rules and you broke them. You make the rules. Both of you. Together. I get that she’d compartmentalized her two sides up until now, but maybe it’s time to break down that barrier and combine them.”

  He might be right, but what if I’m doing irreparable damage to her? I’m not going to stick around to see this through. I’m messing with her life and it makes me fucking nervous.

  Chapter 14

  Evelyn

  * * *

  “I owe you an apology.” Those are the first words out of Colt’s mouth as I close the door to the SUV at six o’clock.

  “Why?” I ask as I fasten my seatbelt. I can guess why but I don’t need him to apologize. We’re in uncharted territory, and we’re in it together. “Please don’t apologize for how you feel.”

  He glances at me as he pulls away from the curb. “I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that this morning, nor should I have texted you while you were at work. It was inappropriate, and I’m sorry.”

  I turn my head toward the passenger side window and stare out, seeing nothing. I’ve been in his presence for ten seconds, and already I’m under his thumb. I can’t stop it from happening. The man is dominant even when he doesn’t mean to be, and my submissive side has slid under his control even though I don’t want it to. Mostly because I’m not ready. I just stepped out of work. I’m in my professional body right now.

  I can feel the power and authority radiating off him inside the SUV. Somehow he’s able to apologize from a position of authority that maintains his obvious domination over me while humbling me at the same time.

  I’m shredded. I never ever leave my adult persona until I get home and change clothes. Never. But he undoes me in seconds. He would have even if he hadn’t spoken. “You shouldn’t apologize,” I murmur. “You weren’t wrong. I did lie and I did sass you.” I don’t turn my head toward him as I speak.

  At the next intersection, he takes a right even though he should have gone straight. I glance at him and then back at the road as he pulls into a parking lot. He puts the car in park in a random spot. He twists his body to face me. He searches my eyes for several seconds. He’s breathing heavily.

  I can’t keep from fidgeting at the intensity. We’re on a weird precipice here. I’m not sure how this is going to teeter, but it’s about to tip one way or the other. I’m not even sure which way I prefer. One is safer and will cause me less anxiety and prevent me from getting hurt in the long run. The other is dangerous territory that will probably break my heart and leave me curled up in a ball. The second option is more appealing though. The risk is attractive. He’s making me feel something I’ve never felt before.

  The longer we sit in silence, the more nervous I get. Agitated. I sit on my hands. That usually works. I’m completely out of my element. Not home. Dressed for the office. Feeling very very little.

  He swallows. “Eve…”

  I make a decision. “Sir?”

  He ru
ns a hand over his head. “My instinct tells me to take control here. Dominate you. Give you everything you crave and many things you didn’t know you desired. Things I never imagined myself. My head tells me to back up, keep our relationship strictly professional. My head is not winning because my mouth keeps getting in the way.” He smiles slightly.

  I stare at him. I won’t interrupt. I won’t make this decision for him or for us. I can’t. I want him to dominate me so badly that I don’t have the power to stop him. Damn the consequences. I know this can’t last. I know he’s not really mine. I know our time together is probably only days, not weeks. But I won’t deny myself this odd experience, no matter how scared I am.

  It’s not really a decision. I can’t stop this train. It already left the station. I’m already his for however long he stays. I don’t have a clear picture of what this looks like, but we’ll figure it out together.

  “There’s nothing to decide, Sir. The choice has already been made. The line has already been crossed. There’s no turning back. I suspect we’ll both get hurt in the end, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.”

  “I suppose you’re right.”

  “I usually am, Sir.” I smile at him.

  “Are you always this sassy?”

  I shrug. “It gets me what I want.”

  “Well, it’s not going to work on me.”

  I pout. Full on. Cross my arms, lift my shoulder, push out my bottom lip, and blow out a breathy pout.

  He chuckles. “You’re cute when you pout, but that isn’t going to work on me either. I know you’re used to negotiating an arranged scene at the club, and I’m anxious to witness it in person tomorrow night, but I’m staying in your home. I’m going to be with you every moment you’re not at work for the foreseeable future. Nothing between us at your apartment is a scene. It’s just life in whatever fashion we make it.”