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  “Do you know how sexy it is watching you play with yourself?”

  She dragged her fingers over the lace between her legs. Her breath hitched when she stroked her clit. Her arousal had been building for the last fifteen minutes just from touching her inner thighs. She hadn’t dared touch her pussy directly. She’d have come before he arrived.

  Neil crawled closer, lowering his face so that his nose ran along her lace-covered heat. “Mmm. You smell so good.” He kept going, using his nose to push the sheer black material up her stomach so he could nuzzle her skin all the way up to her breasts. “This is so fucking sexy. I like the black. Of course, I liked the red too. And any color you choose really. I think we need a lingerie budget.”

  She giggled as she threaded her hands in his hair. “I’m pretty sure I blew this month’s lingerie budget out of the water already.”

  “Mmm. Is there more?” He looked excited.

  “Maybe?”

  He growled before nipping at her nipple through the translucent material.

  She couldn’t help but smile as he lifted his gaze to hers. He swiped a curl from her cheek. “We’ve never discussed triggers, Heather. Any positions that would make you panic? And what about being restrained or spanked or blindfolded?”

  She couldn’t keep her eyes from going wide. “I don’t think I have any of those issues, Neil. Maybe don’t pull my hair to the point of scalping me?”

  He cringed. “That wasn’t on my list of plans.”

  She grinned. “Your list is a bit kinky.”

  “Mmm. Only if you want it to be.” He kissed her neck.

  “I’m intrigued. I know you would never hurt me. Honestly, my horrible past partners were usually drunk and selfish. You’ve never come close to triggering anything, and every time we’re together it gets easier.” She reached for his ass and squeezed his firm butt over his briefs.

  “Okay, I won’t do anything without checking with you first, and tonight, my only goal is to make slow, sensual love to you until you scream. So, no position preferences? Top? Bottom? Side? Hands and knees?”

  She shivered at his imagination. Sex with him was going to be fun. “All of them. You decide.”

  He chuckled.

  “Maybe not all tonight. We can save a few for tomorrow night, right?”

  He laughed again. “Oh, baby, I might even have something left over for a third night.”

  She giggled but she slid her hand around to cup his erection. “We should definitely do something about this.”

  His face sobered and he quickly shrugged out of the last item of clothing, his hands coming to her thong next. “I didn’t get to look at this long enough. Please wear it again soon.”

  She couldn’t respond because his hands were sliding down the insides of her thighs, parting her lips, then stroking through her folds. Her thoughts were scrambled.

  A second later, she gasped when he flipped her over, planted a hand on her lower back, and reached between her legs.

  She parted her knees for him, needing the contact. If he had been anyone else, she would have panicked being tossed onto her stomach and fondled, but two truths changed everything. One, no man she’d been with had taken the time to give her pleasure, so it would never matter what position Neil used to do so.

  And two, even though she’d been with Neil only a short amount of time, she trusted him implicitly. At least with her body. Maybe she was still worried about her heart, but he would not hurt her, and he’d proven he would always give her pleasure.

  She gasped when he found her clit and circled it several times before thrusting two fingers into her.

  “So wet for me. Were you this wet before I got here? Thinking about what I might do to you?”

  “Mm-hmm,” she managed. She’d been aroused ever since she started picking out lingerie in the store, picturing the look on his face when he saw it on her. The man could melt her with his gaze. Her life would be complete if she got to see that look on a man’s face, directed at her, forever.

  When he added a third finger, she squirmed. Her arms were up around the pillow, and she fisted it tightly. “Oh God,” she cried out when he pressed against her clit.

  He pumped faster, his other hand splayed across the small of her back and over her butt cheeks.

  “Please, Neil…”

  “Come for me, baby. Come on my fingers first.”

  She couldn’t believe how easily he could command her to come, and how quickly her body responded to the demand. Was that even a thing? She wanted more though. “Please…”

  “Let me watch the first one, Heather. I promise it will be so much better after you give me an orgasm.”

  She loved how he talked to her. Even his dominant side didn’t trigger her because everything he did was all about her. Selfless.

  Suddenly his fingers fluttered inside her and she sucked in a breath, stiffening as her orgasm crashed to the surface. Her pussy throbbed around his fingers, milking them, demanding more.

  As the orgasm subsided, he removed his fingers and rolled her gently onto her back. She was panting as he climbed between her legs. He wrapped his palm around his erection and eased it up and down. “You’re sure?”

  She nodded. “So very sure.”

  “And you’re okay with me being bare?”

  She nodded again and reached for him. “Please,” she begged with no remorse.

  He came over her, lining up with her entrance. “Fast or slow?”

  “Fast.”

  The next second, he thrust in to the hilt, taking her breath away. She grabbed his ass and dug her fingers into the tight muscles. “OhmyGod,” she breathed.

  Neil kissed her lips. “You okay?”

  “So very much okay.”

  He kissed her again. “More?”

  “So much more.”

  He smiled against her lips, pulled almost all the way out, and thrust back in.

  “Yes,” she hissed. “Do that again.”

  He obliged, the base of his cock doing crazy things to her clit every time he was fully settled. She lifted her hips and ground herself against him.

  He smiled at her, holding himself aloft by his elbows. He was shaking. “Not gonna last this first time, Heather. Reach between us and play with your clit.”

  She shook her head. “I’m good.”

  He lifted a brow. “Let’s go for great, or amazing, or fantastic. Good is not how I want you to describe sex.”

  “It was already amazing and fantastic thirty seconds ago.” She gripped his butt again.

  “Humor me. Give me another orgasm. I want to feel it around my cock before I come.”

  Her fingers were unsteady as she slid one hand between them. She’d touched herself before but never during sex.

  “Yeah. That’s hot. Touch yourself however you like it. Make it feel good.”

  It was one thing to give him a little show as he entered the room. It was another thing altogether to masturbate herself to orgasm with him inside her. “Neil…” She stroked her clit, feeling awkward.

  He cupped her face. “It’s just you and me, baby. Make yourself come for me. I want to hear you.”

  She bit into her lip when she hit just the right spot, and when he thrust again, she felt it so deep. “Oh.”

  “Yeah…” He thrust again. “That’s it. The only thing making me last one more stroke is watching you, baby.”

  She rubbed herself harder, loving how it felt to have him pump in and out while she did so. It was a new sensation for her. A combination of being fucked while masturbating. Like they were both pushing her to the edge.

  “God, you’re sexy,” he whispered as he somehow held himself up with one elbow and slid his hand down to join hers. He combined their fingers, using hers to rub her.

  It was so hot she lost focus. Too many sensations bombarding her. And then she was coming, hard, her pussy gripping his cock. She gasped, trying to hold on to the sensation.

  Neil thrust harder, which felt amazing. She remo
ved her fingers, wrapped her legs around his waist, and dug her heels into his thighs. “Your turn,” she demanded. “Let me watch you come.”

  He moaned around her words, his body stiffening deep inside her, jerking as he released himself into her.

  Her heart raced as he finally relaxed over her, still inside, smiling down at her, stroking her cheeks.

  “So that’s what all the hype is about.”

  He kissed her lips. “Yeah, that’s what all the hype is about.”

  Chapter 15

  Over the next two weeks, Heather settled into a new routine. She needed a new normal, one where she was living with Neil—even if it was only temporary. She knew for him it was a done deal. And she had no complaints, just worries. How long could this last? It was so new and exciting and different.

  He'd shattered everything she’d known about life in short order. She was struggling to wrap her mind around being a part of a couple that didn’t shout—or at least the man didn’t shout at the woman.

  Hell, the truth was Neil wasn’t used to being in a relationship where the woman didn’t shout at the man. That was even more foreign to her.

  She still tiptoed around him a bit, flinching when he stepped into a room. It was a habit. He knew it, and he always made a point of coming to her, kissing her neck or cheek or temple, and whispering something soothing or sweet.

  “You smell so good.” “What color is your thong today?” “Top or bottom tonight?”

  She shivered every time. He was making a point, and it was slowly sinking in. He didn’t care about clothes on the floor or dishes in the sink. The truth was no one else had either. Abusive men would find anything to bitch about. There was no pleasing them.

  She didn’t need to please Neil. He was already pleased. If she stayed long enough would the newness wear off? Would they start to take each other for granted eventually?

  For now, she would take things day by day. She tried not to worry about tomorrow all the time. It felt too good to be true, but so what if it was? She convinced herself it would be better to have had any amount of time in her first normal relationship than none at all.

  She was learning to be a regular person, the kind who went to work and came home to a man who kissed her and pulled her into his lap. Granted, their schedules were sometimes out of sync and chaotic, but Neil had every one of her shifts on his calendar.

  He knew when to expect her and when she would be gone overnight. He knew when she landed and when to call. He rolled over and pulled her into his arms when she got home incredibly late. He’d wake up and make love to her at three in the morning when she had to go in early.

  He hadn’t used the L-word, but she could see it on the tip of his tongue often. Sometimes, he would say something like. “Heather…” The I love you was in the silent pause.

  Fear always hovered in the background, a low humming worry that this couldn’t last, that a bomb would drop and ruin everything. Maybe some of that stress had to do with how many crazy things had happened to her friends at work over the last few years. Her posse was a bit jinxed. They’d been through hijackings and human traffickers and crazy ex-boyfriends and, believe it or not, witch hunters.

  Probably the reason Heather was on edge all the time was because of the weird shit that kept piling up with the airline. Sometimes things would die down for a few days, but then pick up again. Three days might go by without incident before a day with ten crazy stunts.

  There had to be a hacker. They all knew it. Who was it? And what the hell did they want? There was an internal investigation, but the police were involved too. Since nothing life-threatening had occurred, the airline and the authorities had chosen to keep things as quiet as possible.

  People lost luggage all the time. No one was suspicious of late luggage. Delayed flights weren’t so unusual that anyone raised an eyebrow. After all, they had no idea the flight was delayed because no one could open the door to the jetway.

  Heather had been with Neil for two weeks. It was Friday. She had a rare weekend off. She was also getting home early enough to beat Neil. She should have been excited about the weekend. She considered taking a shower and putting on the pink lingerie and waiting for Neil in the bedroom.

  He called those nights “frozen pizza nights.” The nights that began with sex and left them too tired to cook or go out. She’d planned it that way the first night they’d had sex, and it had stuck.

  Something was bothering her though. The hairs on the back of her neck had been standing on end for hours. She’d tried to brush it off, chalking it up to worrying that something would go wrong with her flight and make her late.

  But now that she was home, the unease grew. It wasn’t the sort of experience she was used to. She’d never considered herself sensitive. She thought about calling Neil to make sure he was okay, but the idea sounded ridiculous in her head. If she called him while he was driving, she’d be making him less safe just to ease her peace of mind.

  She changed into jeans and a T-shirt and padded into the kitchen to look into the fridge, hoping a snack might make her feel better. While she looked, her cell phone started ringing where she’d left it on the island.

  The sound was ominous for no good reason. It was a phone. They rang sometimes. Could be Neil telling her he was running late. Or Raeann calling to talk about how uncomfortable she was with her giant belly. Or one of the other women she was friends with. Hell, it could be Amy or Renee. They’d become friends too.

  For whatever godforsaken reason, Heather knew this call was not going to make her happy. She lifted it off the counter and sighed. The name across the screen was from her parents’ next-door neighbor—the one her mother went to when she called Heather.

  Heather hadn’t spoken to her mother in over a month. Whenever they spoke, Heather never shared the intimate details of her life. She didn’t feel like the woman had earned the right to know anything about her.

  Heather could be marginally polite, reassuring her mother that she was alive and well, but that was about it. She didn’t speak of work or friends. She hadn’t spoken to her since she’d started dating Neil. Her mother didn’t know about the apartment fire or that she’d moved.

  Taking a deep breath, Heather answered the phone. Mostly, she just wanted to get this over with so she could get on with her weekend. “Hello?”

  “Heather?” The voice was not her mother’s. “This is Jane Tullius.”

  Heather knew that. It was on the caller ID. She flinched though. Her mother used Jane’s phone to make calls, but Jane had never called herself. “Yes, Mrs. Tullius? Is everything okay?”

  “I’m afraid not, dear. I’m sorry to call with bad news, but your father died this afternoon.”

  Heather’s knees gave out. She barely kept herself from falling. She grabbed on to the edge of the counter and slid down to the floor, dropping onto her butt. Her heart was racing. “How did he die?”

  “He had a heart attack at work. The paramedics came but they couldn’t revive him. I know you didn’t have a good relationship with your father, but I told your mother I would call and let you know.”

  “Where is my mom?”

  “She’s at home. I don’t think she knows what to do with herself. She’s been sitting on the couch all afternoon, rocking back and forth. She’s despondent. I’ve tried to get her to eat or drink, but she stares into space, seeming to not know I’m in the room. Could you come here, dear? I mean obviously, you’ll want to be here for your mom, but I was hoping you could come soon.”

  Heather’s head was spinning. Her father was dead. The asshole who’d done nothing but terrorize her and her mother her entire life was dead. Good riddance.

  She wasn’t surprised her mother was despondent. The woman probably didn’t know what to do with herself without her fucking husband ordering her around.

  “Heather? Are you still there?”

  “Yeah, I’m here.”

  “I’m so sorry, dear. I need to go back and see to your mother. Shal
l I tell her you’ll come?”

  Heather stared at the side of the island, seeing nothing. Come? To Ohio? Fly into the state that held nothing but bad memories for her and go to her childhood home? Fuck no. “Yeah. I’ll call you back when I have the flight information.”

  Mrs. Tullius sounded relieved. “Oh, good. I’ll look forward to your call.”

  Heather ended the call without another word. She dropped the phone to the floor, wrapped her arms around her shins, and set her forehead on her knees. It sounded like she was underwater. Her brain was making too much noise.

  Her fucking asshole of a father was dead. She should be glad. She certainly wasn’t sad. She felt pissed that he was disrupting her life like this though. This weekend should have been spent with Neil, not in Ohio with her despondent mother who’d done nothing to save her child from a cycle of abuse that scarred Heather so badly that she was struggling to have a normal relationship with a good man.

  Struggling to believe she deserved him. Struggling to believe it was possible. Worried all the time that a figurative bomb would blow up in her face and take her happiness away.

  Was this her bomb? Was it possible her life would get derailed by her mother? Could her stupid father ruin her life with his death?

  She nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard her name. “Heather?”

  She jerked her gaze up to see Neil squatting next to her.

  “Baby, what happened?” He reached out to stroke her cheek. Only then did she realize she was crying. Her cheeks were stiff from older dried tears, but newer wet tears were running down her face too. How long had she been sitting here?

  Neil dropped down next to her and wrapped an arm around her, pulling her into his side. “Baby, tell me what’s going on?”

  “My father died.” A huge sob escaped, which was ironic because she wasn’t crying over him. She was crying for herself.

  “Oh, baby, I’m so sorry.” He pulled her closer, lifting her onto his lap and holding her tighter. “Did your mother call?”

  “No. The neighbor did. My mother is apparently despondent. Probably catatonic from the way Mrs. Tullius described her.”