Obeying Rowen Read online

  He rounded to her back to untie her ankles and her arms. When they were free, he rubbed the circulation back into her biceps and shook them out.

  “Thank you, Sir.”

  He pulled her legs to the front next and rubbed her thighs and then her shins. “Keep your hands at your sides. Leave the blindfold. You don’t have permission to look at me while you fuck me.”

  When he was certain she was okay to stand, he took her hand. “Follow me, sweet girl.” He led her down the hallway to his bedroom.

  He’d anticipated bringing her back here tonight, so he had changed the sheets, made the bed, and straightened up.

  He led her to the bed and then kneeled in front of her to unbuckle the strappy heels she wore, lifting first one foot and then the other out of their confines.

  Leaving her where she stood, he pulled the comforter down to the foot of the bed and then returned to lift her by the waist and set her on the cool surface of his black sheets.

  He didn’t delay in removing his clothes and rolling on a condom. His cock had been hard enough to break things for hours. After climbing up next to her and lying on his back, he reached for her waist. “Climb over me, Faith. No words. Just fuck me. I’ll let you control how fast and deep you want to go, but you don’t have permission to come. Understood?”

  “Yes, Sir,” she whispered as she felt around for him and straddled his body, her pussy then hovering over his cock.

  “Lucky for you, I’m going to come in about two minutes, so you won’t have to restrain yourself for too long.” He lined his cock up with her entrance and guided her over him with his other hand on her hip. And then he released her and lifted his hand over his head to cradle his neck and watch the most gorgeous submissive woman he’d ever met fuck him as part of her own punishment.

  She set her hands on his chest and lifted off several inches, slamming back down with enough force to make him gasp. “Faith…” he warned. “If you come, I’ll tie you spread eagle to this bed and torture you with orgasm denial until the sun comes up.”

  She bit her lip and then released it and nodded. Her face was tight as she continued to fuck him. She arched her back spectacularly, her breasts lifting high on her chest as she rose and fell over his dick.

  He gritted his teeth to keep from coming, wanting this moment to last longer, but it was no use. He was totally gone for her. No way could he hold back with her riding him so gloriously.

  On a groan, he came. Hard. It lasted longer than normal, too. Nearly a minute went by before the last of his come pulsed into the condom. When he could convince his arms to follow directions, he grabbed her waist, lifted her off him, and settled her at his side.

  She was shivering, her breaths fast with need.

  Instead of heading to the bathroom to clean up, he grabbed a tissue from the end table and wrapped the condom in it to toss it on the floor. And then he turned off the lamp next to the bed, pulled the sheet and comforter up from the foot of the bed, and drew her back into his chest, spooning her securely.

  It wasn’t until he had her cocooned that he removed the blindfold. The room was dark. It would take her a while to adjust. He kissed her temple. “You may speak freely now. I’m so proud of you.”

  “Thank you, Sir.” She gripped his arms with her small hands. “Thank you.” There was a hitch in her voice, and he lifted one hand to stroke her cheeks.

  Tears. Of regret? Or relief? “Tell me about the tears, Faith. Happy or sad or angry?”

  “Happy, Sir.” Her voice was so soft he barely heard her.

  “Because?”

  “Because I never thought I’d feel like this again.”

  “Like what, sweet girl?”

  “Like I’m home.” She dipped her head and kissed his arm at her breasts.

  Thank. God.

  He brushed her hair out of her face. Most of it had come loose from the ponytail as she’d ridden him. He needed to kiss her, so he pulled her onto her back and leaned over her, taking her lips. Instantly, the kiss was hot and needy.

  He took. She gave. He slid his tongue into her open mouth and tasted every inch of her sweetness.

  They kissed until he couldn’t breathe properly which meant she couldn’t either, and then he pulled back, still nibbling on the corner of her mouth. “You’re an amazing submissive, Faith. This evening was perfection.”

  “It really was.” Her voice was hoarse.

  “You gonna test me like that when I give you an order next time?” he teased.

  “Probably sometimes, Sir.”

  “Good. I’ll enjoy coming up with creative ways to let you know I care.”

  “Looking forward to it, Sir.” She relaxed in his arms.

  He wanted to ask her one more question before he let her sleep. “Was that your first internal orgasm?”

  “Yes.” The one word was breathy.

  Something inside him unraveled at the admission. He owned a piece of her no one else could claim. It endeared her to him even more. He kissed her temple reverently.

  “Your bed is very comfortable.” She snuggled in closer. “Your entire apartment is more inviting than mine.”

  “I’m glad you like it.” He drew circles on her arm with one finger. She liked his place. She wasn’t just saying that. There was no need. She genuinely liked it.

  Her body finally relaxed, and her breathing evened out as she faded.

  He’d worn her out. The stress of submitting to him all week from a distance and then dominating another woman earlier in the evening would have been enough to exhaust a normal human being. But Faith had shown grit and determination, allowing him the pleasure of demonstrating what a future with him would look like.

  He tried to relax next to her, still holding her tight against his side, but all he could do was worry about what tomorrow would bring. He was determined to show her they were perfect together.

  She had said so little about dinner with her parents that he was pretty sure she was equally determined to show him how deep she could dig in her heels.

  What if she refused to take him to dinner? Was it a deal breaker?

  He shuddered. He didn’t know the answer.

  He thought about the lecture Carter and Lincoln had given him about her wealth. They were right. She was not pretentious in any way. She’d never shown any indication she gave a shit about money. It was probable that her parents had a lot of it, and chances were she had a sizable inheritance, but suddenly he didn’t care. He wasn’t sure why he ever cared.

  He took several cleansing breaths, fighting to push his next thoughts out of his mind.

  The situation with her parents was a much bigger deal. It was a boulder between them that wouldn’t budge. He needed to bite his tongue and withhold further judgment until he met her family. But damn, he was stressed about it.

  As he closed his eyes and took several deep cleansing breaths, he knew why he was so worried.

  Because he had fallen for Faith hard. He wanted her. Permanently.

  He wanted to be her Dom. All day every day.

  And that unnerved him because it would hurt like hell if this family situation of hers came between them. He considered waking her and forcing the issue. Now. Making her see reason.

  A bargaining chip might work. He knew she craved being his submissive as much as he wanted to be her Dom. Maybe he could promise to give her everything she needed and wanted in exchange for encouraging her to work out the rift with her family.

  He wouldn’t wake her. That was crazy. She was dead tired from submitting to him. She needed to sleep. But tomorrow. Tomorrow he would plead his case.

  Chapter 25

  Faith woke slowly, wondering why she was so warm for a moment before she realized an enormous arm was draped across her chest, weighing her down. An equally large leg was stretched over her thighs.

  Jeez, was he afraid she might escape?

  She sobered on that very real thought.

  Her bladder was screaming at her, though, so she needed to
extricate herself and find his bathroom. She pushed on his arm and wiggled out from under his leg, but he rolled closer and murmured in her ear, “Where are you going, sweet girl?”

  “Bathroom.”

  He kissed her temple and released her. “It’s straight across from where you’re lying. I know it’s dark in here. Can you see well enough?”

  She blinked several times as she slid to the floor, trying to get her bearings, and then she spotted the opening to the bathroom and headed that direction. “I think I’ve got it. If I run into a wall, I’m blaming you, however.” At the doorway, she grabbed the frame and turned to toss one last word over her shoulder. “Sir.” She smiled as she entered the bathroom, shut the door, and flipped on the light.

  Lord. Even his bathroom was dark. The man loved the color black. Though she did prefer the calming effects of darker colors over stark white, if she lived here, she would toss some bright colors around to give the place character.

  After using the toilet and washing her hands, she splashed water on her face and stared at herself in the mirror. What the hell was she thinking? She would never live here.

  She closed her eyes and sucked in a breath at how painful the thought was. She had permitted herself to live a double life for an entire week—half of her pretending she belonged to Rowen as his permanent submissive while the other half tried to tamp down the reality that he would never be able to accept the entire package that made up Faith Robbins.

  She’d seen him cringe last night at dinner while she spoke about her family. He didn’t believe her. He couldn’t accept that some families were too dysfunctional to carry on.

  She wasn’t right for him. She had pretended for a week because it felt so fucking good. But he needed someone more wholesome and normal. Not a rich, crazy girl who was nearly estranged from her family and refused to let her heart love again.

  She held the edge of the counter as she forced herself to face that last and most important thought.

  She was falling in love with him.

  It scared the fuck out of her.

  She needed to get out of his house. Like now. Fast.

  She needed to run.

  She needed to protect her heart from future possible pain.

  When she finally had the strength to open the door and face him, prepared to tell him she was going to call a cab and go back to her apartment, she nearly jumped out of her skin.

  His entire naked frame was lounging in the doorway, meaning he’d been facing the closed door, probably touching it with his nose, waiting for her to come out.

  “Jesus, Rowen.” She tossed her hand over her heart. “You scared me to death.”

  He lifted a brow, reminding her she hadn’t turned off the light. His eyes were narrowed, squinting into the brightness, but his expression was hard. “Why do I bet you don’t need me to scare you because you’re so damn scared on your own that no one can even top that level of fear?”

  She swallowed and stepped back. “Why do you say that?”

  He took a step forward, crowding her. “Because you’ve been in here for half an hour, which means you spent the majority of that time staring at yourself in the mirror and coming up with excuses to get out of my apartment as fast as possible.”

  Her shoulders fell. Could she hide nothing from this man?

  “Come back to bed, Faith.” He reached out a hand and waited patiently for her to take it.

  She finally did, realizing she was just as naked as him as he pulled her into his embrace. Suddenly, he bent slightly at the knees, tucked his hands under her ass, and hitched her up in the air so she was forced to wrap her legs around him to keep from falling over backward. “Rowen,” she chided.

  He ignored her, spinning around, flipping off the light, and taking her back to bed. He dropped her unceremoniously on the mattress and then climbed over her. As he landed on his back, he pulled her into his side. “I have no idea what’s going through that head of yours, but it scares the fuck out of me. So, I suggest you start talking, or I’ll resort to extreme measures to get you to share.”

  “I don’t know what you mean,” she lied.

  “Sweet girl, do you have any idea how I might go about disciplining a submissive who lies to me?”

  “No, Sir,” she muttered, her cheek pressed against his rock-hard chest.

  He stroked his hand gently up and down her arm. “I’ll demonstrate later. For now, I need you to talk. Openly. You gave me a huge piece of yourself the other night. I want the rest. Now.”

  “It’s the middle of the night.”

  “Yep.”

  “Let’s talk about it in the morning.”

  “Let’s talk about it now.”

  “I’m tired.”

  “You weren’t tired enough to put forth some cockamamie argument and present a good case for leaving my bed in the middle of the night, so you aren’t too tired to tell me what you’re running from.”

  “I’m not running,” she defended, stopping short at the last word when it occurred to her she was lying again.

  He pulled away from her several inches, his upper body stretching toward the other side of the bed. The next thing she knew, the lamp was on, and he was back at her side, leaning against the headboard, staring down at her. “Are you testing me?”

  “No, Sir.” She swallowed as she pushed to sitting, facing him, tucking the sheet around her chest.

  “Okay, listen, we haven’t had an opportunity to discuss a single particular about what a permanent relationship between us might look like, but let me paint it for you because I know in the long run that’s what you need.”

  She didn’t dare move, scared out of her mind about what he might say because she knew it would be enticing, and now wasn’t a good time for him to point out how fucking perfect he was for her. He could easily get her to cave.

  He continued. “We know each other well enough from a week of correspondence and three encounters to realize we match really, really well. You’re super clear on the fact that I haven’t had many long-term relationships because I’m a demanding Dom who likes to control things and provide for and protect my woman.

  “You know perfectly well I’m exactly the sort of Dom you crave. I’d even hedge a bet that it kind of stresses you out to realize how good we are together.”

  She stiffened. He was right. It scared her to death. She fit with him even better than she had with Victor, and that made her feel guilty. Intellectually, she knew it was unwarranted, but she couldn’t keep the idea from invading her mind.

  As if he read her thoughts, he brought Victor into the conversation. He reached for her hand and tugged her closer. “I know you had a full-time relationship with your husband. And I know you loved him deeply. But he wasn’t home many times, which left you having to switch in and out of sub mode.

  “When he was away for months at a time, you would have needed to step up to the plate and take care of far more than you wanted to. I’m not suggesting there was another way or that you would do anything different if you could do it over. I’m simply pointing out that I know it had to be hard for you.”

  She nodded. He was right. She sometimes had whiplash from submitting for several months and then being alone and in charge of everything for the next few months. It had been stressful even though she had never said a word.

  Rowen’s voice softened. “Sweet girl, I get it. Now let me tell you something about what I would expect from you. What I do expect from you.”

  She met his gaze and held her breath.

  “In the long run, I’m looking for twenty-four seven. I never thought it would be possible to find it with anyone.”

  She opened her mouth to offer a lame protest in order to get him to shut up before she became putty, but he stopped her with a finger to her lips.

  “Let me finish.” He stroked her bottom lip as he removed his finger. “If you choose to submit to me, giving it one hundred percent, it won’t mean I never let you relax and have down time to yourself or just to b
e when we’re together.”

  She furrowed her brow, having no idea what he meant.

  “What I’m saying is that you will have times when I don’t want you to use ‘Sir’ with me, when I don’t want you to have to think about every move, wondering how I’ll react. No one can be expected to truly give every waking moment to a ‘yes, Sir’ submission without getting totally exhausted.

  “There will be times when I give you permission to speak freely and relax without fear of retribution. What makes me the Dom is that I will choose those times and/or consent to your request for that kind of relief.” He dipped his head farther. “There will be times when I insist upon it. Now is one of those times.”

  She didn’t move a muscle as she took in his words. He wanted her to open up to him. And he wanted her to do so without submitting. In fact, he demanded it.

  It felt right. It felt warm and good. She would be a fool to turn him down. She would miss out on an opportunity she hadn’t fully admitted to herself was important enough to fight for until that moment.

  The truth was she wanted him. She wanted to fight for him.

  Taking the cowardly way out and running wasn’t going to work because he’d gotten so far under her skin that she knew she would never be the same.

  She took a deep breath. “It scares me to allow myself to love again.”

  He pulled her closer. “I know, sweet girl.”

  A tear slid down her face and she brushed it away. “I’m afraid of what will happen if I lose another man.”

  “I know.” He tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear. He didn’t say more, as if sensing correctly there was no way he could promise her he wouldn’t leave her, especially to death. She appreciated his silent acceptance.

  She continued. “You have a serious hang-up with my parents.”

  “Yes, I do.” At least he didn’t deny it. That would have rankled too.

  “I never intended to take you home with me later tonight.”

  “I figured that.” He smiled.

  “One of two things would happen. Either they treat you like shit and you decide you can’t take the heat and run as fast and as far as you can, or…” she hesitated, unsure how to continue.