Obeying Rowen Read online

  The door to the restroom opened, and she glanced over to find Sasha stepping inside.

  “Oh, hi.” Sasha smiled as she headed through the sitting area to the bathroom. After a few minutes, she returned, drying her hands on a paper towel.

  She looked amazing, wearing all white. Her darker skin offset the fitted, stretchy, white dress. It wasn’t as revealing as a lot of submissives wore, but it was still sexy. The tight skirt landed a few inches down her thighs and the bodice covered everything important. She even wore a bra, the lace showing through the slightly translucent material. Her heels made her seem taller than she was, and Faith pegged the two of them to be almost the same height. Five four.

  Sasha started speaking almost before she was fully back in the room as she tossed her paper towel in the trash can. “I heard you did an amazing scene before I arrived. Sorry I missed it.”

  Faith smiled.

  “You okay?”

  She nodded and then took a deep breath. “It wears me out, especially when I do more than one. I did another scene earlier before Zodiac opened.”

  Sasha lowered herself onto the matching red armchair. “How long have you been a Domme?”

  Faith took a deep breath and glanced down at her hands, trying to decide how much to reveal about herself. She’d met Sasha several times, but she had no idea if she could trust her. Suddenly, exhaustion won out over common sense, and she let her guard down. “I’m not. Not really. I mean, not all the time.” Faith scrunched up her face. “I’m not making any sense.” She liked Sasha. She’d met her a few months ago when she’d still been a member of Breeze and Sasha had come as a guest for her first foray into BDSM.

  Sasha smiled warmly, not pushing Faith to keep speaking but waiting patiently in case Faith decided to continue.

  Faith licked her lips and sighed. “I learned to top years ago when I first joined Breeze. I was young. I wanted to try everything. The entire lifestyle intrigued me. I was a sponge.”

  “That must have been amazing. I wish I’d had that opportunity.”

  “You’re so young still. You have time,” Faith pointed out.

  Sasha chuckled. “I don’t think Lincoln would be too excited if I decided I wanted to switch.”

  Faith narrowed her eyes. “What do you want?”

  “Wow. Deep.”

  Faith waved a hand through the air. “Don’t mind me. I get melancholy sometimes. I like to make sure everyone is true to themselves.” Like you’re being true to yourself?

  Faith shook her own self-recrimination from her head.

  Sasha nodded. “Even though I’m new to the scene, I’m not new to the concept. I’ve actually been coming to this club since I was twelve.”

  Faith’s eyes bulged before she could stop herself from reacting so violently.

  Sasha shook her head. “Don’t get the wrong idea. I didn’t come into the club itself before I was eighteen, and even then, only sparingly until a few months ago. My mother died when I was twelve. My father had skipped town when she got pregnant.”

  “I’m so sorry.” Faith’s chest seized. She had always been a sensitive person. Hearing something like that tugged at her heartstrings.

  Sasha continued. “I was lucky. My brother, Rowen, was ten years older. He had just gotten out of the army, and he took me in. He also worked nights here at Zodiac, so the owner let me hang out upstairs in the breakroom while my brother worked.”

  “Lincoln?” Faith knew Lincoln was the majority owner with two other partners, but she didn’t think he was old enough to have been here that long ago. Besides, somehow he was also Sasha’s Dom. Faith hoped to God this story didn’t start to creep her out.

  Sasha shook her head. “No. John Gilbert owned the club back then. Lincoln bought it five years ago. I was seventeen. In fact, he freaked out about my age the day we met and banned me from even coming near the club for the next year. I’ve never been so humiliated in my life. He had a hissy in front of everyone who worked here, and I’d known them for five years. They were like siblings to me.”

  “Wow. How did you come to be his sub? You must have wanted to punch him in the face.”

  Sasha giggled. “Yeah. I did. But I also wanted to jump his bones. And it turns out he felt the same. It took us another five years to figure that out.”

  Faith laughed finally, relieved the story hadn’t gone in a squicky direction. “So, I guess you knew enough about the lifestyle to know what you wanted.”

  “Definitely. I didn’t have experience because my brother and his partners didn’t let me join the club, but I knew I was a sub. I knew I was Lincoln’s sub, to be honest. I’ve never considered playing with anyone else. I didn’t even date.”

  Faith was stunned again. “That’s kinda…nice.”

  “It is.” Sasha smiled. “What about you? You seem to be in tune with other people. Why do I get the feeling you aren’t very happy yourself?”

  Faith gave an exaggerated wince. “That obvious?” She sighed. It wasn’t like her life was a secret. The members of Breeze knew her story. She didn’t intend to go around blabbing it to everyone she met, but that was because she didn’t like the way people looked at her with so much sorrow when they knew.

  “You don’t have to tell me anything you aren’t comfortable with. I didn’t mean to pry.”

  “No. It’s not that. It’s just been a while.” She glanced down at her lap and pulled her fingers from under her thighs. They were still shaking, so she threaded them together. She felt comfortable with Sasha, and it had been a long time since she’d had a close friend who was in the lifestyle. Maybe it was time to open up to someone. “I was married. My husband was in the navy. He was killed in the Middle East a year and a half ago.”

  Sasha’s eyes widened. “Oh God. I’m sorry.” She covered her mouth with her fingers.

  “Yeah. Me too.” Faith swallowed. “I met him when I was twenty-four. At Breeze. He was on leave. We hit it off immediately and got married two months later.” She didn’t add the gritty details, like the fact that she hadn’t told her parents about Victor until after the wedding. That she’d intentionally hidden her excitement to avoid their chastisement and disapproval.

  After all, Victor wasn’t nearly good enough for Faith Davenport. He hadn’t come from money. He didn’t own land or businesses. He was totally unsuitable.

  Faith had never exhaled freer in her life than the day she took his name and became a new person—Faith Robbins. TMI for Sasha, though. Another time.

  Sasha’s eyes widened farther anyway. “How romantic.”

  Faith chuckled. “That’s not what most people said to me. Usually people looked at me like I’d lost my ever-loving mind. But I knew.”

  Sasha shook her head. “No. I get it. I think I felt that way about Lincoln the day he walked into Zodiac when I was seventeen. He did his best to squash my feelings, but he didn’t succeed. I was head over heels before he even spoke to me.”

  “Then you do get it. It’s a rare thing.” One I’ll never experience again. Because I’ll never allow myself to.

  “Yes, it is.”

  Faith took a breath and decided to steer the conversation down a less serious path. “He was all Dom. I had been dabbling in every aspect of the lifestyle for two years. When I met him, I was a switch, but I could dominate anyone, male or female. Victor put an end to that. I turned myself over to his care without blinking and never looked back.”

  “And now?”

  “Yeah. Now. That’s a conundrum. For a while I didn’t come back to the club scene at all. And then I returned to Breeze, but everyone looks at me like they’re going to cry when I see them. So that sucks. I haven’t played much in the last eighteen months. I was the dungeon monitor the night we met at Breeze.”

  “Yes. I remember.”

  “The owner, Marcus Pierson, encouraged me to switch for a while to get back in the scene. He was probably right, but after submitting so thoroughly to Victor for so long, I’m rusty. Uncertain. Drained.”
>
  “So maybe you need to switch back to subbing? Give that a try?”

  “Yeah. Maybe.” Faith looked down at her lap. “Honestly, it scares the hell out of me.”

  Sasha’s voice was gentle when she spoke again. “Submitting to another man?”

  “Feeling.”

  Sasha pursed her lips, nodding.

  Faith hadn’t spoken so frankly with another woman for a long time. It felt good. Freeing. She liked Sasha. Maybe they could be friends. She suspected the two of them had a lot in common. “Anyway, Master Pierson also suggested I transfer my membership to Zodiac where less people know my story and won’t look at me with so much sorrow. And here I am.” She hesitated. “I’d appreciate if you’d keep my story to yourself for now. It’s not like a huge secret, but it’s refreshing not to have everyone staring at me with such sad eyes.”

  Sasha smiled warmly. “Of course. I won’t utter a word to anyone. I’m glad you’re here. If there’s anything I can do, let me know. I’m usually here when the club is open. I don’t always come downstairs, but if you ever want to talk, just ask Lincoln or Carter or Rowen and they’ll find me or you can come upstairs.”

  “I’ve met Lincoln and Carter personally. I haven’t met Rowen formally, but I think I know which one he is. I saw him last night after my scene. Tall? Six foot? Same brown hair, tanned skin, and green eyes as you?” Obviously. Now that she thought about it, the two siblings looked a lot alike.

  “That’s him.”

  “He probably thought I’d lost my mind the way I blew past him after taking care of my sub. I was exhausted. I didn’t even make eye contact.” But I saw him. Lord have mercy, I saw him.

  “Yeah. He told me he watched you, but he didn’t mention thinking anything particular about your escape, so I think you’re good.”

  “He mentioned me?” Faith sat up straighter. Her heart beat faster. What the fuck?

  Sasha’s slow smile spoke volumes. “I think he was a bit smitten. But if you tell him I said so, I’ll have to kill you.”

  Faith laughed. “Our secret. Does he not have a submissive currently? Girlfriend? Wife?” Oh, great. Now I sound way way way too interested.

  “None of the above. He had a girlfriend. She’s also a member. Rayne. She comes here about once a week. They split up about three months ago. Amicably. They weren’t compatible.”

  They weren’t compatible… In what way? Faith was not going to ask that question.

  “His words. Not mine.”

  “Ah.” That told her nothing.

  “Anyway, we never had this conversation, but if you’re interested, I can safely say the feeling is mutual. Go for it.”

  “I don’t know. He’s one of the owners. And I’m still a little…guarded.”

  “Well, eventually you have to put yourself back out there. You’re too young to hang on to the melancholy forever. I can’t imagine how you must feel. I don’t think I would be as put together as you seem to be if anything happened to Lincoln.” She stood and headed for the door, but at the last second she turned back around. “I meant what I said before. If you need a friend, I’m here.”

  “Why do you spend so much time upstairs?”

  Sasha grinned. “Because my brother would have a coronary if he saw an inch of my skin or had to watch me play.” She plucked the front of her dress. “Though I’m not sure how it matters since this is about the riskiest piece of clothing I own.”

  Faith furrowed her brow.

  Sasha shrugged. “Admittedly I’m not much of an exhibitionist myself, but on top of that, Lincoln doesn’t like to share even a glimpse of me. So staying away from the club while Rowen is here is kind of unnecessary, but he still doesn’t like to see me play. So we trade off.”

  “Ah.” Made sense. Not many brothers would want to see their baby sister strapped to a spanking bench. Or worse. This younger woman was intriguing. And how interesting that Lincoln was so possessive. The idea made Faith squirm. She hadn’t been turned on in a long time. How could these simple words about someone else’s life make her pussy wet?

  Sasha kept speaking, not noticing Faith’s plight. “He was supposed to already be gone when I got here tonight, but apparently he got so engrossed watching you that he lost track of time.” She winked and then she was gone.

  Faith flushed so hot her face burned. Surely Sasha was exaggerating. She’d noticed him the night before, but it was interesting to know he’d watched her again tonight.

  She squeezed her legs together and pictured the intense look she could imagine on Lincoln Walsh’s face as he told Sasha what she could and couldn’t wear. Maybe it was nothing like that. But visualizing it made Faith hornier than ever.

  Was Rowen that kind of Dom too? If he was…

  It was easier when all she knew about Rowen was that he was hot as sin. Now he had admirable traits to go with his good looks. Dammit. The guy loved his sister and had taken care of her as a kid. That said a lot about a man’s character.

  Chapter 4

  Two weeks later…

  * * *

  Faith arrived early at Zodiac Saturday night. She wanted to change out of her street clothes and take some time to wander around in the club before she did a scheduled scene later that evening. Lately she found her dance card completely filled with both men and women who wanted to sub for her.

  She was a good Domme. She knew it. But it wasn’t her passion.

  For now, it was her persona, at least at Zodiac. She didn’t usually see anyone who was a member of Breeze, so no one had ratted her out as an imposter.

  She sighed as she changed out of her street clothes and into one of her favorite club outfits. She was hardly an imposter. It wasn’t specifically a secret that she had once been a submissive. It was just that no one had asked yet, and she was enjoying the anonymity at Zodiac, riding that wave for as long as it could last.

  She wasn’t exactly misleading people. She was trained as a Domme. She’d been a switch for two years before she met her husband. As a way to ease back into the play scene, it was safer and less stressful to control others than to permit herself to be on the receiving end of demands.

  Maybe one day she could return to subbing, but she wasn’t ready yet.

  As she was putting her purse in one of the small lockers in the women’s room, her phone buzzed. She sighed, pulled it back out, and glanced at the screen. Her mother.

  Nope. Not tonight.

  Not tomorrow either. She was not going to let thoughts of her mother get under her skin while she was at Zodiac. The woman didn’t belong in this world.

  After stuffing her phone and the rest of her belongings into the locker, she checked the mirror, straightened her skirt, and stepped out into the dim lighting of the club. It was early, only nine, but several people were already at play in the main room. As she wandered back by the entrance, she passed Carter, the head bouncer and part owner. He smiled at her in greeting.

  The next person she saw was Lincoln. He nodded at her as he walked by. She had yet to meet the elusive Rowen.

  Not that she wasn’t perfectly aware of who he was. It was highly possible she was subconsciously avoiding him. She’d seen him several times from a distance. He was usually serious, brooding. His brow was often furrowed in concentration or aggravation. She didn’t know which.

  It was unlike her to avoid someone, especially one of the owners of the club, but something about him made her aware of herself in a way she hadn’t tapped into in a long time. It unnerved her to find herself aware of someone in such a carnal way. She wasn’t sure she was ready for something like that. Even though Victor had been gone a year and a half, she felt a bit guilty for even entertaining the thought of another man yet. And after her conversation with Sasha, she had to suspect Rowen was paying attention to her too.

  As Faith stepped into the main room, she glanced around, her eyes adjusting to the dim lighting. Zodiac took up the second floor of a strip mall above the shops. Originally a large apartment, this main room would h
ave been the family/dining room. As a club, it had an entirely different feel. With the dark walls, floor, and ceiling, it had ambiance.

  The room had a variety of apparatus—including a few spanking benches, a St. Andrew’s cross, a bondage table, a massage table, and even a suspension system in the center. The walls were also lined with various means of securing a submissive.

  Her gaze suddenly landed on the very man consuming her thoughts. He was helping another man with a new apparatus at one corner of the open floor. It was a spider web. She’d seen a few of them before, but this one was huge.

  The web itself was made of silver chain, and it was stretched to the corners of a large wooden frame. It would allow the user to arrange a sub in any number of possible positions. The best part about it was that any submissive of any size could easily be attached to it spread wide. If this one was anything like the one they had at Breeze, it could be leaned back, leaving the sub on a bed of chain at any angle the Dominant chose.

  As she watched Rowen from behind, he tugged on every section to ensure its safety. He checked the bolts all along the frame and then the frame itself. He even heaved his body off the floor, suspending by his hands from the top of the frame and swinging back and forth a few times to make sure it was well and truly safe.

  A second man was helping him, adjusting the chain in several locations, removing a few links in some spots and adding a few in other places. Considering the tool belt around the man’s waist and the coveralls he wore, Faith assumed he was the designer who built the new apparatus.

  A woman Faith hadn’t noticed before stood several feet to one side of the web, biting a nail as she watched. She glanced several times at Rowen.

  An unwelcome tightness spread across Faith’s chest as she wondered if Rowen was going to attach this sub to the new spider web and play with her. Jealousy reared its equally unwelcome head.

  Faith would give just about anything for a man like Rowen to bind her to that web and tease her mercilessly. She didn’t know him at all, so her irrational lust for him was just that, irrational. Nevertheless, he had been the focus of several masturbation scenes in her mind in the last few weeks. Each of which had been followed by an unwelcome feeling of remorse as if she had no business pondering a sexual encounter with someone who was not her husband.