Teaching Abby Read online

  I’m still sitting in the chair, gripping the arms now, when Levi returns. He has his laptop bag over his shoulder. He smiles at me from the doorway, shoulders sagging. “I’ve really fucked with your head, haven’t I?”

  I nod slowly. Now I have the million questions he inferred I would have. But now I really don’t want or need the answers. “Can we just forget it happened?”

  He sags against the doorframe. “No. You can’t unsee that.”

  I never should have seen it in the first place.

  “I can see your mind racing, and the thoughts you’re having are way off track and far worse than the actual truth. That’s why I’m going to have to educate you.”

  I swallow. “I’m well educated. I have an economics degree.” I’m half joking.

  He chuckles. “Yeah, well, now you’re going to get a crash course on BDSM 101. It’s my fault. I own my stupidity, but I won’t leave you sitting there with your mind racing to come up with wild answers to questions you can’t even form.”

  He’s got a point.

  “I promise the truth isn’t half as bad as what you’re thinking.”

  “Is it legal?” I at least want to know the answer to that question.

  “Yes, Abby, it’s legal.” He nearly groans. “Consenting adults can do almost anything they want, including shoot videos of themselves enjoying sex.”

  “Having sex?” My voice raises as I glance at the closed laptop again. It’s infected now with I have no idea what. I’m going to be afraid to touch it again. “That wasn’t sex. He was hitting her with that, that, that, thing.”

  “Flogger.” Levi steps farther into the room, his voice calm and low. “He wasn’t hitting her, Abby. He was flogging her. There’s a difference. She enjoys it. It feels good. Many people like it. I promise. Did you miss the part where she had a huge orgasm and screamed out her release?”

  I shake my head too hard. I did not miss that part. No. I nearly experienced it myself.

  Levi steps closer, too close. He steals my oxygen. I’m still aroused from the damn video. It’s not something I can turn off that fast. And Levi is a very attractive man. And his voice is now soothing and calming. He cups my chin again, his thumb stroking my cheek. “I didn’t miss the part where you were as turned on as that submissive either.”

  I close my eyes. Yes, I totally need the earth to swallow me. Now would be good.

  “There’s no reason to be embarrassed. I get that you’ve never experienced that before, not like that I mean, but it’s natural, and based on your reaction, I would say you’ve got some exploring to do. Have you ever been to a fetish club or practiced any type of kink?”

  I shake my head, not losing his grip. “No.” My voice is gravelly.

  “Well, there’s a whole world out there for you to tap into then. I’m not saying I have any business introducing you to BDSM, but now that you stumbled on that video, I have an obligation to at least educate you peripherally. You can do with the information as you please, but I won’t leave you with unanswered questions. That would be irresponsible of me.”

  “I don’t have questions,” I lie. “I’m good.”

  He smiles warmly. “Abby, let’s go home.”

  I take a deep breath. He’s not going to let this go. I’m lucky he’s not mad. That is still stunning to me. I’m also lucky Beck isn’t here to add to my humiliation, though I suspect he’s going to find out about this later.

  Levi releases my face and holds out his hand, encouraging me to stand.

  I finally find the will to rise to my wobbly feet, ignoring his hand. It seems like a bad idea to touch him. I might end up leaning into him for support, physical and emotional. I’m a wreck.

  Gathering strength I shouldn’t have, I stride across the room, grab my purse, and then follow Levi out of the office. Somehow I make it out the back door and into his Lexus. I half wish I could sit in the back seat and stew rather than next to him where he can glance over at me easily during the drive.

  We sit there for a second, Levi staring at me, making me fidget. Finally, he points toward my shoulder. “Seat belt, Abby,” he murmurs.

  Right. Jesus. I’m totally out of sorts. I scramble to tug it down, but I can’t get it in the buckle. My hands are shaking.

  Levi sets his hand on mine and squeezes.

  I let go of the belt, and he buckles it in for me without commenting on how unnerved I am. Finally, he pulls out of the parking lot. The ten-minute drive back to the house is going to take ten years. It’s too hot in the car. I feel like I’m going to suffocate.

  Levi is too calm. Too quiet.

  All I can do is sit on my hands, stare out the window, and pray for a do-over of the entire day.

  Chapter 10

  Master Levi

  * * *

  Fuck.

  Fuck fuck fuck.

  Beck and Julius are going to kill me. I’ve texted them both and told them to meet us at the house, not telling them why. I hope we don’t have a fight in the foyer in front of Abby. She’s hanging on to the edge of sanity by a thread. If we argue about my stupidity in front of her, she might lose her grip on that thread.

  This is all my fault. I can’t believe I was so careless. I had no intention whatsoever of introducing Abby to this side of the business at any point during her internship. This was not in the plan.

  I purse my lips. I can’t shake the image of finding her there watching that video. I should have let my presence be known. I shouldn’t have watched her like that. It was intrusive. She was having a private, life-altering event, and I had no business playing the voyeur.

  I couldn’t stop myself. She was so damn…hot. I thought she was going to orgasm in her chair. She’ll probably have marks on her tits from squeezing them with her fingers. My dick was so hard it’s a wonder I didn’t come in my pants too. For a moment I thought we both might.

  I should have eased out of the room and left her alone. I should have done so many things. I didn’t. I watched. I fucking watched her nearly come in Beck’s office. I squirm even now in my seat, trying to adjust my damn hard-on without her realizing how fucking aroused I am.

  Fuck.

  It took every ounce of strength in me to keep from finishing her off. When I kneeled in front of her, I wanted to set my palms on her thighs, press her skirt up, and bury my face between her legs. She would have come in a heartbeat. I know it. Screaming.

  I can’t shake that image from my head. I’m so very fucked. Sure, I’ve been attracted to her from the moment she arrived last week. Or even before that if I’m honest, which I have not been. But I also knew right away that she’s not familiar with the fetish world. Not even close. She proved that this afternoon.

  Her eyes were so wide, and I thought she might bite a hole in her lip. I wanted to suck that poor lip into my mouth and soothe it with my tongue. I still do.

  I want her to kneel in front of me like the submissive in that video and look up at me with those innocent eyes. I want to run my thumb over her bottom lip and then command her to suck it.

  Fuck.

  Fuck.

  Worse? Worse than that? I want her to submit to Julius or Beck or both so I can watch. I want to fucking film her innocence as it’s defiled so I can watch her blossom over and over again for the rest of my life. I wish I had a video of her watching that clip in that chair. That alone would get me off every day for a year

  Thank God I’m able to drive home on autopilot because I don’t remember much about the drive until I realize I’m pulling into the driveway. Beck’s car is in the circle drive. I know Julius was already home.

  It’s time to convince my cock to settle down because I’m about to get the third degree from my partners, and it’s not going to be pretty.

  Chapter 11

  Abby

  * * *

  I don’t know how I have the inner strength to get out of the car, but somehow I manage to swing my legs around when Levi opens my door. I’m wobbly. Anxious. I don’t particularly w
ant to enter the house and learn more about whatever Levi thinks I need to know.

  He’s wrong. I know he’s wrong. Whatever kinky shit he enjoys on the side is not for me. I don’t want to know more than I do right now. I’m good. I’m past good.

  Except you’re not.

  I try to tamp down the voice in my head that wants to know more. They have a studio in the house? I didn’t know this. No wonder. If they shoot porn in it, no wonder they didn’t tell me. Oh, pardon. My bad. Not porn. Fetish videos or whatever Levi called them.

  I’m wringing my hands together when we step inside. The foyer seems larger than it has in the past week. Or I feel smaller. Something. I’m out of my element.

  Without a word, Levi heads to the left. I figure he’s aiming for the library. I’m certain Beck and Julius are about to join us. Then I’m going to have three men in my face, and two of them are not going to be pleased.

  I no longer believe anyone is going to be mad at me. I’ve gathered from Levi that he feels one hundred percent responsible for what happened. He’ll take the blame. But if these men are making sex tapes as a side job, I don’t think any of them intended for me to find out.

  When we round the corner and step into the library, Julius is standing by the window. Beck is sitting on one of the sofas. He jumps to his feet as Julius steps forward. “What happened?” His face is drawn together in concern, his gaze darting from Levi to me and back.

  Levi runs a hand over the top of his head and blows out a breath. Yeah, he’s nervous. Great. “I fucked up.”

  Beck groans, making me wonder how on earth he has suspected what happened?

  Julius speaks. “Please tell me you didn’t make a move on Abby.”

  That? That’s what they think happened? I take a step back, wishing for the tenth time that I could disappear. This is their thing. Not mine.

  Beck jumps in next. “I told you hiring her was a bad idea. I knew you were attracted to her and wouldn’t be able to keep your dick in your pants. Do you not realize we can be sued for sexual harassment?”

  What. The. Hell. Is. He. Talking. About?

  I start shaking my head. They’re both way off base here.

  “Jesus, Levi,” Julius adds, sounding disappointed. He spins around, looking like he would like to punch a hole in the closest wall.

  Levi tips his head back and groans at the ceiling before righting himself. “Would you two shut the fuck up? No one made a pass at Abby. I haven’t touched her.”

  Well, that’s not entirely true. He did touch my face. Twice. It was kind and I liked it. A bit too much. I can still feel the stroke of his fingers against my skin.

  Both men freeze. Their gazes come to me, leaning around Levi. I’m still trying to hide and failing. They search my face, glancing up and down my body at the same time. I feel like they’re stripping me to see if Levi is telling the truth. That doesn’t even make sense.

  “Abby?” Julius questions.

  “What happened?” Beck asks before I can respond.

  Levi answers. Thank God. “I accidentally uploaded Katarina’s last submission file into the Johnson wedding folder.”

  Julius groans.

  Beck stumbles backward. His hand goes to his chest. “Did she…watch it?” His gaze comes to me.

  I bite my bottom lip hard, nodding. “Sorry,” I mumble.

  “All of it?” his voice raises.

  “Enough of it,” Levi responds.

  Beck’s face turns red. His skin is so pale that he can’t hide it. His gaze jerks to Levi’s. “Jesus, Levi. She’s too innocent for that. She’s probably never been to a club nor seen any kind of submission before, and she gets introduced to the fetish world by watching her boss dominate a woman on her knees?”

  I gasp. My boss? I take another step backward, stumbling. Until this moment, it hasn’t occurred to me that I knew the man in the video. I had a fleeting thought that the voice was familiar, but I didn’t realize it was Beck. I’m going to pass out.

  Julius rushes toward me and grabs my biceps as I start to go down. He sets a hand on my lower back, swings to the side, and ushers me toward one of the leather sofas. “What a clusterfuck,” he murmurs under his breath.

  “She didn’t know it was you, asshole,” Levi informs Beck.

  Beck’s voice rises. “How the hell was I supposed to know that?”

  I set my elbows on my knees and try to breathe. I wish they would all be quiet so I can think. I wish they would leave me alone. I need to concentrate.

  This isn’t what happens though. Nope. Not even close. Instead, Julius kneels in front of me, and Beck and Levi flank me sitting on both sides. I’m crowded and I’m going to hyperventilate.

  Julius’s hand lands on my head, and he guides my face toward the floor. “Give her some space. She’s panicking.”

  That’s an understatement.

  Ten billion thoughts are going through my head. I don’t even know what the truth is anymore. I try to sort out the facts. My three bosses have a secret studio somewhere in this house where they shoot private videos for kinky people. Got it.

  Oh, wait. Beck is in one of them. He knows how to wield a flogger and make a woman come on his hand. I tip my gaze toward him, trying to reconcile the man next to me with the guy in the video. I can’t help it. The thought of him thrusting his fingers into someone turns me on in spite of this total insanity.

  No. That’s not true. The thought of him thrusting his fingers into me turns me on.

  I glance at the other two concerned faces, making a decision. I’m in this now. I need more information. “Show me.”

  Chapter 12

  Master Beck

  * * *

  I stare at Abby for a moment, blinking. When she says show me, is she talking about the room or does she want some sort of demonstration?

  She meets my gaze sitting up straighter, somehow gaining strength as if she’s over her shock and has come to a decision, good or bad. “It’s done. I saw it. I should have stopped watching and gone to Levi. I should have deleted it. I did neither. I watched. I was intrigued. I couldn’t get myself to stop. If you want me to leave, I will. I get that this is going to make things awkward between us. But I’d appreciate it if you showed me the studio and explained a few things to me first. Otherwise my mind is going to conjure up all kinds of ridiculous explanations for the rest of my life.”

  I nod. She’s right. I know Levi didn’t do this on purpose. He looks like he’s going to vomit. His face is tight. He’s stressed. Uncertain what the right thing to do is. I look at Julius.

  Julius pushes himself to his feet. He puts his hands on his hips for a moment and then nods. “Come on then.”

  I take Abby’s elbow as we stand, making sure she’s stable, although she seems stronger now, and I have no right to touch her. I’m lucky she doesn’t jerk her arm away from me.

  I’m not embarrassed about what we do. Far from it. In fact, I love when we train a submissive who is new to the scene. But new is one thing. Blindsided is a completely different animal. When a submissive comes to our home either to train under our supervision or to do a shoot with his or her own Dom, Domme, or Doms, they’re at least making their own choices. Abby has been thrust into this without her permission.

  I wonder what happened when she confronted Levi. Or did he find her watching? I glance at him, but his attention is on Abby as we walk down the hallway toward the back stairs. Next to the wide staircase that leads to the second floor is a locked door that leads to the basement.

  Julius unlocks it and swings it open, reaching inside to flip on the lights. It’s not a dungeon by most people’s standards. It’s bright and inviting. It can be whatever we want it to be actually. There are no windows, but that’s only because we never take the risk of someone seeing in from outside. When we use this studio, we always lock the door behind us.

  Randle and Meredith are fully aware of our lifestyle and our home studio. They’ve seen every imaginable kind of kink in the past ten years.
People come and go from this house in all manner of clothing and sometimes naked. Our staff is discreet. Always.

  Meredith steps into the hallway from the kitchen when she hears us. “Oh,” she says softly, her brows drawn together. She hasn’t expected this either. It wasn’t planned. She seems to catch herself and backs away.

  Julius motions for us to descend before him, and I take the lead. I shouldn’t be nervous. I’m never nervous about our lifestyle. I’m not ashamed by any stretch of the imagination. But this is Abby. She wasn’t meant to find out about this part of our lives. She’s too innocent for this introduction she didn’t ask for.

  And fuck, I’m attracted to her. I have been from the moment she first arrived. I’d like nothing more than to thread my fingers into her hair, tip her head back, and kiss her senseless. Strange for me. I don’t usually think about kissing as often as I have in the last week.

  I see why Levi hired her. There’s a magnetism. She draws people in with her smile and wit and strength. Until today, I haven’t seen her waver. She’s nervous. I know this because she won’t stop chewing on her bottom lip. It’s going to be swollen and sore. If she were mine, I would pluck that lip from between her teeth and punish her if she did it again.

  But she’s not mine. Not even close. She’s not any of ours.

  I feel her presence at my back. She doesn’t falter on the steps. She’s got grit and determination that have returned now that she’s over the initial shock. That alone is making my dick hard. The combination of her innocence and her confidence is sexy.

  When we hit the bottom of the stairs, we’re already in the studio. It’s a large space that can be sectioned off or used for a big group of people. I flip on the lights and pray to God this doesn’t go badly.

  As I glance around, Abby coming up behind me, I try to see things through her eyes. There’s nothing about the room that particularly screams BDSM. Most of the toys and various equipment are located behind two doors on the right side of the room. Storage. We can create any kind of scene someone wants in this room, or no scene at all so to speak, like it is now.