Refuge Page 5

  He held her gaze, his face an inch from hers. His voice was low and gravelly when he spoke. “I want this. You. Whatever it looks like, I will be onboard. And I’m sorry I’ve dragged my feet. I won’t let it happen again.”

  She nodded slightly, breathing heavily. “That was… Well, Kester and I didn’t get that far before Stu walked in. And we shouldn’t do that again. I told Stu…”

  He winced. “I’m sorry Kester didn’t get his full kiss. And thank you for giving me that piece of you. I promise to keep my hands to myself until we convince Stu to get with the program.”

  “Not forever, mind you. I do have my limits. I’m not going to die a virgin just to get under Stuart’s skin. I just want to make a point. This plan felt like it could be effective.”

  “I agree. And it’s genius.” He grinned. “If Stu can’t come around under this type of pressure, he isn’t going to ever.” Tarin released her cheek and slowly stood, taking her hands in his. “I need to meet Kester now. He’s going to be waiting for me.”

  She rose and smoothed her hands up his solid chest before she reached higher to wrap her arms around his neck. “I’ve kinda run out of willpower. I hope you two can be convincing.”

  He kissed her forehead, lingering there for several moments. “We’ll do our best. The motivation is strong.”

  Chapter 6

  Three days later…

  * * *

  Stuart not only broke his word, but no one had seen or heard from him since the morning she’d confronted him. Ariel was furious. She’d spent the better part of the last three days pacing and growling any time she was not working. She’d barricaded herself in her room at the Schamas’ apartment the rest of the time.

  She’d been grateful for their hospitality from the moment she’d arrived, but lately, she’d been equally thankful that they’d left her alone to work things out on her own. Willa, Ledger’s mother, had interrupted Ariel’s pity party only one time two days ago, and only to let her know that she was there for her and would lend an ear if needed.

  Finally, this morning, Ariel had received some news she was thrilled about. A group of Wanderers was heading out tomorrow morning to find and bring back more clothing and supplies to make clothes. Ariel had been invited to join the team because they could really use a female on the trip.

  The clothing exchange mostly consisted of four employees who spent their days helping outfit the entire compound. Sometimes that meant sorting and organizing clothes by size. Other times it meant sewing in order to fill gaps in the inventory.

  Ariel had learned to sew at a very young age. While her sister had spent her days watching plants grow—boring—Ariel had learned everything she could about fashion and practicality. She wished she’d been born in a different era, perhaps Victorian or even early twentieth century. She was particularly fond of flappers.

  But no. She’d been born into a dystopian society in which the main goal was just to find anything that would fit.

  The team she would be traveling with consisted of three men and herself. When she’d told Layla, her sister had pursed her lips and said very little. After all, she herself traveled from time to time with the agriculture department. She’d even been nearly captured once and had been forced to hide in the forest for a very long, gut-wrenching afternoon and evening that nearly drove her partners out of their minds.

  “I’ll be fine,” Ariel had told Layla, trying to reassure her. “I haven’t been above ground since we arrived three months ago. I need to see sunlight.” And not just from skylights that were the only source of natural light found in the compound.

  Everyone who lived in this bunker spent some time each week under the skylights for their own mental health, but it wasn’t like the real thing. No one could actually see the sun itself. Just feel its rays.

  It was late in the day when Ariel was studying the maps with the rest of the team, memorizing their route for tomorrow and listening to last-minute safety precautions that Stuart finally made an appearance. How not shocking.

  His huge frame filled the door to the library where the team was meeting. His presence was so foreboding that everyone in the room turned to look at him.

  He was scowling, and his gaze was pinned on Ariel. “Over my dead body,” he growled, hands on his hips.

  Ariel’s face turned ten shades of red. How dare he disappear from the compound for three days, going against his word to meet with Kester and Tarin, and then show up now to shout at her in front of her entire team as if she were twelve—again.

  Gray Tillson, one of the three council members, was in the library with them, approving the final plans. He stood from his spot at the table and stalked toward Stuart. “Watch it, Stuart. You’re about to cross a line here.”

  Stuart shot Gray a glare and returned his stare to Ariel.

  She had two options: tell Stuart to essentially fuck off and risk him being so angry that he got escorted permanently from the compound or…try to talk him off the ledge he was standing on.

  Furious didn’t even begin to describe how she felt about his behavior, but she didn’t want him sent away either, so she calmly faced her team. “Please excuse me. Would someone mind filling me in on what I’ll miss in a while?”

  “Of course,” Abnor stated. “I’ll bring you up to speed tonight back at the apartment. Don’t worry about it. Go. Take your time.” Abnor Schama was Ledger’s father and Willa’s husband. Ariel was staying in his home. His willingness to keep this interruption from getting out of hand and catching her up later made Ariel grateful for his hospitality all over again.

  “Thank you,” she stated as she passed Abnor and headed for the door. She set a hand on Stuart’s chest to shove him out of the way and proceeded to stalk down the hallway, heading for Stu’s apartment. She was not having a fight with him in the corridor.

  Luckily, he followed her, saying nothing. He was on thin ice with the council, and everyone knew it. The fact that he’d left the compound for three days had probably been to his benefit, but someone must have gotten word to him that Ariel was planning to leave the bunker, otherwise she doubted he would have returned so soon. He was obviously still hot under the collar from their last interaction.

  She stepped aside and waited for him to type in the code and open the door to his apartment, and then she slid inside and waited for him to shut the door before she spoke.

  She wanted the first word. She intended to get the last word too. “How dare you?”

  He leaned against the door, hands on his hips. His eyes were ablaze with aggravation. “You’re not leaving this compound, Ariel. End of story. I don’t care what you do to get out of it, but do it. You can fucking tell them I forbid it if you want. I’d rather be excommunicated from The Wanderers than have you leave here on some half-cocked mission just to piss me off.”

  She gasped. “Are you serious? You actually think I’m going on this trip to make you angry? How self-important can you possibly be, Stu?” She shook her head, mostly because she couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “I’m going on this clothing run because we need clothes. That’s it. I don’t need your permission to go, and you can’t stop me.”

  He seethed. “You’re going because you want to rile me up. I bet you thought it would bring me back to the compound, and you were right. Happy now?”

  Heat raced up her cheeks. “No, I’m not fucking happy, you arrogant prick. I’m infuriated. This is stooping too low even for you, Stu. Did you really think it would go over well for you to stomp into the planning meeting and shout orders at me? Jesus, Gray Tillson was there. He has the power to march you right out of the bunker and not look back.”

  Stu gritted his teeth. If steam could have literally come out of his ears, it would have.

  Since he didn’t respond, she kept talking. “You cannot order me around, Stuart. Once again, let me point out that I’m not a child. I’m a grown woman. I have complete autonomy over my being in this community. If I want to go on a clothing run, I damn well
will do so. You need to back the fuck off and apologize to the council, or you’re going to be in serious hot water.”

  He lifted one hand to rub his forehead. “Please don’t do this, Ariel,” he stated in a surprisingly calm voice. “Tell them you’ve changed your mind. Don’t go. Do it for me,” he pleaded.

  He almost tugged at her heartstrings. Almost. A part of her did feel sorry for him. Maybe he’d had some sort of experience in the past that made him overprotective. It made sense. Maybe his mother or his sister didn’t come back from a mission. She had no idea since he was so clammed up that no one knew if he even had a mother or a sister.

  Except for Tarin. Ariel suspected Tarin knew more than anyone, but he was a good friend and didn’t share people’s private information.

  “I’m going, Stu,” she stated as gently as possible.

  He started pacing. “If you need to get out of here so badly, let me take you. Let me protect you. Don’t go with that group on the clothing run. It’s not worth risking your life.”

  “No one is risking their life, Stu.” She rolled her eyes.

  He stopped pacing to glare at her. “Every step out of this bunker is a risk to your life, Ariel. Don’t be naïve. If you’re going to be flippant about it, then I damn well will treat you like a child.”

  She shook her head. “No. You won’t. You don’t own me. You don’t even have a casual relationship with me because you’re too stubborn. You’re nothing to me. I’m nothing to you. Not even friends.”

  “You’re everything to me,” he shouted. “Everything.”

  She gasped and took a step back, nearly stumbling and falling on her butt. “Prove it.” She lurched forward, getting in his space, planting her hands on his chest, and tipping her head back. “Prove it,” she yelled louder.

  His arms remained locked at his sides, his hands fisted, his jaw tight.

  “Prove it,” she repeated. “If you can’t do it with words, at least do it with your mouth.”

  She’d barely finished her sentence when he grabbed her biceps, spun them around, and flattened her to the wall. The wind was nearly completely knocked out of her as his lips crashed into hers.

  She grabbed onto his waist, mostly because she needed something to hold on to in order to keep from swaying to one side and falling. It seemed like she might faint.

  God, Stuart could kiss. He didn’t slide in gently and nibble along the seam of her lips or tease her with his tongue. He consumed her, delving into her mouth without any warning. His hands were on her shoulders, but they slid down to her waist and then up her torso.

  She gasped into his mouth when his thumbs stroked the undersides of her breasts. Rising onto her toes, she angled her head to the side to give him better access to her.

  She was shattered by him. Devastated. Ruined. From a kiss.

  He was hot and demanding and powerful. He didn’t kiss. He devoured.

  It was nothing like the other kisses she’d experienced. When Stuart kissed, he put his soul into it. He stepped closer, tormenting her with his thumbs while he pressed his torso against her. His erection was impossible to ignore, the enormous length pushing against her stomach.

  And still, he kissed her, grinding against her until she couldn’t think or remember how to breathe.

  When he slid one hand down to her butt and then reached between her legs from behind to cup her heated core, she cried out and jerked free. His touch set fireworks off in the room, but warning bells joined at the same time.

  Part of her wanted to strip off her clothes and let him fuck her like the out-of-control beast he was right now, but she came to her senses and remembered the two other men in her life who didn’t deserve to have her rutting against Stuart without their knowledge.

  She was panting, trying to catch her breath as she wiggled free of him and shoved him aside so she could break contact. God, she wanted him. He’d brought to life feelings she’d only read about. Her clit was pulsing inside her jeans. Her breasts were heavy with the need for direct contact.

  “Don’t go, Ariel,” he whispered, not meeting her gaze.

  “Fuck you,” she shot back as she inched along the wall to get more space between them.

  When he turned toward her, there was so much pain in his eyes. He reached out a hand, but she batted it away. “Don’t touch me.” She moved farther away from him until she was jammed into the corner of the room, still breathing heavily.

  “Ariel…” There was a plea in his voice. “I’m not…”

  “What? You’re not what?” she demanded.

  He turned to fully face her, hands fisted at his sides once again. She didn’t dare let her gaze roam down his body though. “I’m not good for you. You’re soft and kind and sweet and generous and so damn innocent. I’m the opposite of what you deserve.”

  “You don’t get to tell me how to feel, Stu.”

  “I scared you. Can’t you see I’m all wrong for you?” He waved a hand through the air.

  She shook her head vehemently. “You did not scare me. That’s your arrogance speaking again. I’m not fucking scared of you, Stuart Duggan. You just made me feel more alive than I’ve ever felt in my life. I’d give anything to have you fuck me clear into the next day. I’m on fire with wanting you to finish what you started. I’m not fucking scared of you. I’m scared of losing myself to a man who’s too stubborn to open up to me or anyone else. A man who’d rather hide behind his feelings than admit them. I’m afraid if I let you make love to me, I’ll be ruined and you’ll still keep me at arm’s length.”

  “Ariel… Babe…”

  She held up a hand. “I’m not done. One more thing. I won’t have sex with you or any other man until we’re all in agreement. I won’t leave anyone out. It’s all or nothing. I told you that. You lied to me. You promised you would talk to Kester and Tarin. Instead, you took off and went into hiding.”

  He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, calming marginally. “That was wrong of me. I’m sorry. I meant to face them. I swear I did. I wasn’t lying to you at the time I made that promise.” He reached with both hands and tugged on his hair in frustration. “There was too much going on in my head. I couldn’t sort it all out. I needed some time. So I left.”

  “Well, now I’m leaving. And I’m going on that trip tomorrow. I’ll make excuses for you so you don’t get kicked out of the bunker while I’m gone, but you better pull your shit together and find a way to talk to Kester and Tarin while I’m gone. You have two days. Got it? My patience is running out. Two men are waiting on me while you dork around. It’s not fair to them. It’s not fair to me. Two days. Decide if you’re in or out. Your decision is final, Stu. If I come back here and find out you haven’t put forth any effort, it’s over between us. For good. Do you understand?”

  She shoved away from the wall and strode toward the door.

  “Don’t walk away from me, Ariel. This conversation isn’t over.”

  “This conversation was over before it started, Stu. And I’m not walking away from you. You’re walking away from me.” With that, she opened the door, stepped out into the hall, and closed her eyes, flinching as the door snicked shut behind her.

  She was shaking as she walked away. It seemed crazy to have given him an ultimatum like that. It’s over between us? What? Unless she counted the smoking hot kiss he’d just given her against the wall, there had never been anything real between them to be over.

  Except there always had been. From the moment they met three months ago. It had been there. Simmering. Smoldering. And now she’d laid down the law.

  Chapter 7

  Kester leaned against the wall next to the exit, trying hard to project an outward sense of calm even though inside, he was nervous as fuck. He waited for Ariel and her team to finalize their last-minute details and hoist their packs onto their shoulders. He waited for Willa Schama to kiss Ariel’s cheek and wish her luck. He also waited for Tarin to cup her face and give her a brief kiss on the lips.

  Finally,
it was his turn. He reached out one hand and hauled her against his body, his other hand sliding to her lower back. “Be safe,” he whispered, his lips a hair’s breadth from hers.

  “I will,” she murmured.

  He couldn’t keep his brow from furrowing as he stared at her, praying this wouldn’t be the last time he saw her. It was damn dangerous out in the world, especially for a woman. Ariel was slightly naïve and young and beautiful and so many other things. If the wrong people got their hands on her…

  He refused to think like that. She would be in good hands. Abnor was armed. They were all armed. But Abnor had the most training in combat. He’d been in the Army before the world came crashing in on itself. It was Abnor’s presence that kept Kester from hyperventilating.

  Elias and Dawson—the other two members of her team—could handle a weapon and had amazing self-defense skills too. Plus, Kester was well aware that Ariel was in amazing shape and her father had taught her how to take care of herself.

  None of that made him happy about this arrangement, but it kept him from losing his mind. Sort of.

  How had he gotten so attached to this woman? A handful of pseudo-dates and one brief interrupted kiss and he was whipped.

  He slid his hand up into her soft blond hair and held her close, his lips brushing hers. “You better come back. Don’t make me have to hunt you down.”

  She giggled. “Promise.”

  Kester reluctantly released her and watched as she and her team exited the compound.

  Tarin stood next to Kester, setting a hand on his shoulder. “She’ll be fine… Right?”

  “God, I hope so,” Kester muttered as he turned to face Tarin. “Shall we hunt Stuart down or make him come to us?”